Life Musings

A few things I feel, for those who still read.

2010-12-30T01:24:00.004-07:00

This one kind of represents the way that I feel about a lot of things. Namely, food. High fructose corn syrup is changing its name. I don't know what to yet. But this is how that move is making everyone feel.

I had a lovely Christmas. I loved that there were a lot of kids. After 4 ish hours of opening presents, this is exactly how I felt.

Right before leaving for Christmas break I was on the phone with a patient, and said, "I hope you have a Merry Christmas." To which she responds, have you ever spent a Christmas without your pain medication, severely depressed, and wanting to kill someone?" I said, no. But cheers anyways!

This is a shout out to all of the low calorie, non fat, celery eaters. I love you, but give me some real effin food! I have had all the green-chile, bacon, chile relleno burritos, and potatoes to get me through till next Chritmas. It was lovely.

Now that I have that all out, just wanted to say, Merry Chritmas, Happy New Years, and how happy I am to spend this time with family this year. I loved Christmas last year, and miss my host family a lot, but nothing is better than home. Or what used to be.

food blogging - Is it for me?

2010-10-10T23:10:00.005-06:00

To jump start my 5 month hiatus from blogging, which will include a few last stories from Bolivia, some post-Bolivia thoughts, some in-between thoughts, and finally updates into my next stage of life, I am going to write about what has most occupied my time, brain space, and been my -avoid real life- tasks excuse. Food.

I landed at Will and Sarah Krzymowskis house as my transition headquarters, arriving July 27th, meeting my - as close as it comes to perfect - niece Mabel, sleeping in their cozy basement, and entered the world of Weston A Price. Price is a dentist who undertook the incalculable task of researching traditional and ancient foods. It sounds to me like a close to impossible task, and with my limited, but influential time spent in other cultures, food eaten by the groups I have interacted with has mostly meant deep fat fried starches, refined sugar, flour and rice, but luckily always with a reliable source of cheap, delicious fresh fruits and vegetables. I wasn't all that excited about it to start, partly because some of the pillar foods including raw milk, grass fed meat, farm fresh eggs, high priced oils (coconut, fish, olive), and nothing but the best in organic local produce. If I could eat this every day without a ounce of gourmet guilt, I would. I whole heartedly believe in whole foods, coming from our neighbor farmers, food that isn't on drugs. What I couldn't get over, was, who can afford this?!? Sometimes the foods can cost double what the conventional option costs. For example, the cost of a gallon of raw milk (the cheapest I heard of), was 7$. Buying organic milk at the grocery store, if I am remembering correctly, was no more than 4$. Buying non organic milk at the grocery is probably 3$ and less per gallon.

How is it that we have come to a place where our ultra pasteurized, shipped hundreds of miles, added overhead costs milk is priced at half of what the raw milk costs, when we pick it up 10 feet from the fence of the cow pasture? Well, that is a long story, that is narrated in excellent movies such as Food, Inc, and King Corn, or written about by Michael Pollan, Sally Fallon, Barbara Kingsolver, and hundreds of other food activists. We are eating doped up foods, and it is being financed by the government. So this point has been made, and made again, and then again in the past few years. Yet, I currently work in a primary health clinic, and the choices I see made very day by health care workers lets me know that they point hasn't quite been made loud enough. Why do we have candy sitting out? Yes it seems like a very innocent thing to put candy out for staff, but when you do a very Weston A Price act, and read the ingredients label on that piece of candy.... The other part that hasn't been done effectively yet, is make real food available to low income populations. I just started working as a care coordinator for diabetes, hypertension, high cholesterol and asthma at a clinic for low income and uninsured, and already I can't count the conversations that end in, "I can't afford that, I can't even afford my medications." What can change? I just don't know. I guess I will look at every conversation I have with a patient as an opportunity to talk about this reality, to maybe talk about the role food plays in our lives, and that perhaps we all should see it as the first line of defense against disease. I haven't tried this approach... I start seeing patients in a few weeks... Ill let you know how it goes.

scarves. ecumenicism, and a culture of peace

2010-05-08T16:34:00.002-06:00

Today, I am wearing a scarf I bought while in La Paz for the first time. I have had them hanging in my closet, I have looked at them every day hoping for the day cold enough to wear them. Today was that day, the "sur" (cold winds from the south) arrived, and we are shivering and drinking four cups of coffee a day when only 12 hours ago I put a fan on so I could sleep. Though I have been complaining non-stop about the weather in Santa Cruz, that it is like a passionate latin and prefers to be at extremes, the dramatic change last night has brought a lot of necessary hope into my day. Unfortunately, cold weather in Santa Cruz is like 7 feet of snow in Spokane or New Mexico, no one goes out. I planned a workshop today for the kids in our district to meet the new guy in charge of art, and had texted and called 20 kids. I had 5 show up, and when I asked what the heck was going on, they said, "it´s cold out, no one leaves their house." Lame. Well, I had a good day nonetheless.

Ecumenicism has been on my mind lately, partially because I started taking a class at an Ecumenical seminary on the History of the church in Latin America. Last Sunday my co-volunteer, who directs a orchestra and choir were performing at a Catholic church in the center as a part of the Boroque music festival. I invited my host sister, Paola, knowing that she wasn´t going to go because of our church. She responded, "I have to go to church," to which I responded "the concert is in a church," and she says, "no, a CHRISTIAN church." I just wanted to be stubborn and said, "we are all part of the same church, and worship the same God." I know that doesn´t mean anything to them, and she rolled her eyes at me to affirm. I know there is a big division between the churches, but I haven´t ever been so close to it, and also listening to the side I mostly disagree with.

That afternoon in the church, after the concert, some MCCers were chatting when one mentioned it was too bad that none of the Bolivian MMCers made it to the concert, to which our country Rep (latin himself) replied, yes, they are just not ready for that, they are about 10-20 years away from that. He went on a recent trip to visit some churches in Chile, and told us about how the Evangelical church in Chile was just recognized as legal four, yes FOUR years ago. None of the evangelical churches have doors out front, they are all on the sides of the buildings for anonymous entrance. Only the Catholic churches had doors that are facing the streets, and are clearly open to the public. The Reformers risked their lives to separate themselves from the Catholic church, and it looks as though in Latin America, though not anything like the reformation, people are standing up against the Catholic church, and a lot of times their families and cultural norms. The next day I heard about a class being offered at the Ecumenical Seminary in Santa Cruz, and I jumped on the opportunity. I agree with ecumenicism, but I realized that I couldn´t see how the type of faith my host family practices could be part of creating a culture of unity in the churches, and then realized that I was being contradictory when I excluded their church. And now I see what makes things so hard.

So we talk a lot at SEPA about a culture of peace that we are trying to create in schools. If we can´t start to create a culture of peace between churches, people of faith who believe in the prince of peace, how are we going to create peace with people who don´t share that starting point? Well, I never thought this year was ever going to end, but the cold weather has brought me just a little bit of happiness and hope, so our workshops on cultures of peace and mediation should be able to bring me the same little amount of hope.

Just an Update

2010-04-23T08:29:00.004-06:00

All that is coming at you is an update, and an apology that I haven´t posted in a month.

I have mostly just continued working, living life with the Suarez family, with frequent coffee dates with fellow volunteers, and occasional skype dates with loved ones in different time zones.

In work, we have moved from planning and selling the project to teachers and school directors, to getting school governments elected and planning the mediation workshops. This afternoon we elect our very last student government in District 8! Some of my favorite moments from in the election process has included seeing three students that went to camp elected President of their schools. One cleverly used the acronym DENGUE for his frente, and during the school debate his supporters were yelling "DENGUE DENGUE DENGUE!!" I thought it was so funny, and later learned that it was also a spin off of a comment the super inappropriate mayor made about a lady on the news. This student, heading up DENGUE, is one of those good-looking popular guys, who is super nice, super cool, talented, and comes from a really violent and poor household. His success and initiative to lead personifies the vision of SEPA (prevention of gangs, providing spaces for leadership), and personifies the hope I had in coming to Bolivia (investment in a the sustainable development method of investment in youth). The flipside is that I see how many students are in these schools, I know realistically how many have a similar home situation, and know how many of those kids will choose another path. The overwhelming scope of the situation isn´t hidden in Bolivia, it walks the streets, it sits next to me on the micro after a night of drinking at a bolichi, it robs phones out of our hands, it takes the only pssessions of our neighbors, it hits the single mothers in our church, it mistreats the children we work with. There are good kids who are going to do important work, but most the time I feel tired by what it will take to turn the society around. New influences will make this tough, like right now I am sitting at an internet cafe around the corner from my house, a block from one of the schools we work in, and there are 10 computers occupied by boys all under the age of 12 playing violent video games. uggghhhh.... even though it is super that the 6 or so year old boy sitting next to me makes a little exploding noise every time he kills someone.

As for how I am doing, I am counting down the days to go home...83 After 8 months here, I feel like I still don´t feel like a part of my family. There are moments I feel good, but I just don´t think it will become a supportive, life-giving place. I struggle to connect to two of my three host siblings, and my host father. My host mom is crazy, but I know she loves me and we have a good time talking, and my host sister Paola is a good friend. I get through day to day. Yesterday I watched three episodes of my latest drug, then worked all afternoon and evening. In a hopeful note, I have come to a place where I know I have to help myself, that no one is responsible for improving my life but me, so I am going to be doing the things I like, like cooking, even if it will cost me 10% of my stipend to bake a batch of cookies.

So I made a few lists of things, random things, and here is the first. Proof that Bolivian´s do whatever the hell they want.

1. One night around the corner from my house, a family had a party out on the street. They blocked off the entire street. We had to drive three blocks the get around it.

2. Once while riding a Micro, we came across a traffic jam in the lane of our direction. My micro driver jumps the curve, and drives into traffic to get around the jam. I guess I did get to my stop a lot faster.

3. There is frequently human excrement outside the house of the couple working in the rural program.

4. Micro drivers go off the route whenever there is traffic. I feel good that it doesn´t throw me off too much now, but when I just got here it was not appreciated.

5. My host dad, after being in an car accident with a friend, was rejected over and over again from taxis because they didn´t want blood on the seats.

That is a shorter list than I have written at home, I just can´t remember what other rediculous things Bolivians do.

In an update about what comes in the next year for me..... wiat till I figure it out:) I plan on being in one of two places, Albuquerque, close to family, a few good friends, and possible grad school for the following year. Or the northwest, with family, more friends, and trees, cities I love, and what is in the air in the northwest. I am looking for jobs that will combine any of my interests, public health, environmental sustainability, transformative education for youth or college age students (opening them to global issues, environmental issues etc..), and latino populations. So, if anyone reading this has any stellar connections, send them to allyn.krzy@gmail.com.´

That´s all for now, I will be back on here sooner than in a month, I promise.

Phantoms

2010-03-23T10:25:00.002-06:00

One of the challenges of cross-cultural work is coming face to face with the superstitions, hypocrisies, and fanatic ideologies of anther culture. When starting relationships, you assume the best of the others. When you did a little deeper and find them to not be perfect people, you are both relieved and disappointed. Beyond these feelings, I have felt really challenged by the racial and religious comments I hear day in and day out with friends I have in Santa Cruz. After attending a college, who I believe strives to face these destruction causing ideologies in the classroom, it is challenging for me to face them in the real world. When my host mom, after telling her about a challenge that a friend is facing at work, tells me that perhaps the director of the workplace is going through a hard time, because in a time before they were striving for money rather than to serve the Lord, and that now God is teaching them a lesson, I don´t know how to respond. What I usually do, is think about the ideologies that exist in my culture, and that almost always gives me grace to those I am talking to. Yet sometimes, I just get angry that we live in a world where there are so many evils that plague our minds.

So what is there to do about this? Should we find truth, then preach it from the rooftops, fight for it without truce? This sounds nice. Yet I can´t help but think that it is the same thing that caused the problem in the start. Fanatic ideas.

Well, here are some quotes from Les Miserables, not that they give answers to everything, but Victor Hugo just says things nicely.

"Superstitions, bigotries, hypocrisies, prejudices, these phantoms, phantoms though they be, cling to life, they hve teeth and nails in their shadowy substance, and we must grapple with them individually and make war on them without truce, for it is one of humanity´s inevitabilities to be condemned to eternal struggle with phantoms. A shadow is hard to seize by the throat and dash to the ground."

"The characteristic of truth is never to run to excess. What need has she of exaggeration? Some things must be destroyed, and some things must be merely cleared up and investigated. What power there is in courteious and derious examination! Let us not carry flame where light alone will suffice."

-Victor Hugo

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Working for change

2010-02-22T09:40:00.003-07:00

“I can only answer the question ‘What am I to do?’ if I can answer the prior question ‘Of what story or stories do I find myself a part?’” -Alasdair Macintyre

I have come to find this statement extremely true, in that the first question can come so easily, yet the second one rarely follows. Reading this statement reminded me of a conversation I had with a friend after a listening to a talk by another worker here in Bolivia, who said, ¨we are working toward healing, and you have to see the difference between healing and change." I adhere to a worldview that says we are all fallen. In any and all interaction we are looking for healing of our brokeness. As a Christian I am aware of what many Christians abscribe, of which I can´t say I believe, which is that we are healed when we have met Jesus Christ. For many, this leads to the sharing of Jesus Christ to those who they presume don´t know of Jesus Christ. I believe we are still broken and working for healing after a relationships with Christ begins. When we step into a place of awareness of injustices and needs in the world, we say, "what am I to do." I see no other place to start than to ask the latter question, "of what story or stories do I find myself a part?" or in other words, what is my identity? There is reputation of people and Christians coming from the north to the south, and being the educators, like somehow we skipped out on the whole, fallen world thing, and the south didn´t. This statement I think isn´t only incredibly important for Christians doing development work for the reason of our belief in a fallen world, but also that of our story being intertwined into the Christian narrative. Corny this may sound, but we are all a part of one world, where we share more in common with others than not, and we are all in search of healing. We need to start thinking differently, try to take down some of the ways we seperate ourselves from others in our minds.

Downright Diverse

2010-02-17T09:50:00.008-07:00

The first part of my year here in Bolivia, I was stuck inside the fast growing, part-tropical, part-desert, sprawling city of Santa Cruz. In the past two months, I have been from one side of the country to the other. What I have seen, is a country that is incredibly diverse. An accountant at work showed me the website of her brother, who is a nature-photographer, and I am going to share some of his photos to show you that there is more to Bolivia than Llamas, big mountains, and salt flats. I have some of my own photos, but I left my cable at home, and I have some time so I will share with you first these beautiful photos (later come my attempt at taking nature pictures).

What you will see in Magazines when talking of Bolivia, the sky reaching mountains, the brown land, the big skies.

These are the cloud forests that lie in the Western part of the department of Santa Cruz.

These huge flat lands also lie in the high Altiplano.

This is a region called, Refugio Volcan, which lies just two hours West of flat Santa Cruz. I would take weekend trips, if a volunteer stipend would allow it.

This is one of many rivers that lie between Santa Cruz and Cochabamba.

This is a lake near Cochabamba.

Mt. Sajama, the highest in Bolivia (21424 ft)

A River near where Bolivia, Paraguay, and Brasil meet.

I don´t remember about this one.

Duele Crecer

2010-02-02T15:59:00.000-07:00

Reflecting back on my painful growing moments is always surprising. I am surprised by how infrequently I think about those experiences, and how strong the emotions still are. I was reminded this week of some of those emotions, and the reality in life that it hurts to grow. The organization I work for, SEPA, uses a variety of a workshop Jesuit high schools have used in Latin America for the past 20 years. I say a “variety” because we take out the Catholic aspects (changing them to general spritiuality) and we cut it down from 10 to 5 days. It is a leadership workshop, that uses dynamic activities to teach important lessons about the reality of their world we live in, starting with the self, moving to community, then to your country, to youth in Latin America, the world, and then ending on what leaders are responsible to do about these realities. One activity that is used as a sort of “capstone” of the course is called “creating the dream world.” The kids are given the instructions to build what they see as a dream world, all with assigned careers, life situations and family situations. Toward the end of the activity, they are told that a meteor us hurtling toward earth, and will kill everybody who is not inside of a refuge. They have about 10 minutes to figure out what they are going to do. About half of the students just decided to party till they are smashed by the meteor, while the other half tried to hold community meetings that didn’t go over so well. The unemployed character came up with the idea to build a refuge, so in the last 2 minutes they made a refuge out of chairs, which at the very last minute crashed down, and so everybody died.
The entire camp is set up as a sort of equation, where they are given workshops on certain leadership topics, and later on in the week given activities that sort of test whether they learned to apply those ideas. This activity of building the dream world was the last “test” of the week, and when the hard lesson came to them that they failed at building a world the resembles the one they live in, the one that they say there is something wrong with. It was a hard lesson, and the kids were really affected. I was really affected. They were given the chance to, in a completely artificial and unreal context, create something that is not possible in the real world. They really learned an important lesson, as well as did I. I was personally affected by the way the kids really learned the lesson, and when they were given the opportunity to respond, they were very open and very responsive to the lessons the facilitators were trying to teach them. As someone who has been thinking so much about how hard it is to change the stubborn ideas that we build in our minds that end up being the basis of why we go to war, why we hurt other people, and why we can´t make a better world. It was inspiring to see them open to new ideas. Before coming to Bolivia, I was excited about the possibility of working with youth, because it seemed to me to be a sustainable and effective form of development. Now half way through my year, I think it is right. I think that working in human development is critically important. It was one of the toughest weeks I have had in Bolivia, but the hope I found in youth being inspired to affect their worlds in a positive manner got me through. I will fill you in on the challenges later They were important cultural lessons, which I am still trying to figure out, but I think they will be good lessons. Thanks for all your support!

The slump

2010-01-23T08:22:00.002-07:00

Here is an article written by good friend Anna Gray, who is a volunteer much like I am in Bolivia, in Peru.

When I found out I was going to spend my volunteer year living in the Andes mountains, I was elated. For me, spending time in the outdoors is a source of peace and one of the strongest reminders of God’s beauty. Here in Huancayo the surrounding country side has continued to nourish my soul, but has also served as a reminder of the grave injustices that plague Peru and our world.

It is common to see socio-economic injustice manifested geographically, and Huancayo is no exception. The poorest and most alienated of the region’s populations live high in the surrounding mountains. Many struggle to simply provide their children with proper nutrition. Some communities have begun to worry that they will be the first to be effected by the oncoming climate change, as resources become more limited.

Below in the apparently peaceful Valley Mantaro, ugliness continues to permeate the natural beauty. The Mantaro River, which runs through the entire valley and serves as the primary water source for farmers, is severely polluted. This is due to the greed and carelessness of mining companies located upstream of the valley (for more information concerning this, read the Red Uniendo Mano’s releases on US smelter Doe Run), a clear and distressing example of economic interests overriding basic environmental and human rights.

Despite the unsettling reminders of broken relations, both among humans and between humans and the Creation, I cannot help but to continue to find hope in the natural beauty that I find here in Huancayo. Just two days ago, my host sister Haydé and I sat on top of a small mountain, eating oranges and surveying the valley below. I smiled as I noted the lush greenery exploding around the edges of the polluted river, a vibrate reminder that amidst the brokenness of our world life continues to thrive.

I read this this morning, and I liked it for a few reasons. First, because I could identify with it a lot, and it was written so beautifully (something I have always been jealous of Anna about). Secondly, because I have been in a bit of a slump, like the cross-cultural curve always told me I was going to have (why didn´t I believe them?!?). I identify with Anna in the effect nature has on me. It is a very important part of my spirituality, my way of experiencing God. Santa Cruz can be tough because this part of my life is absent. It is not often that I get out of town (except in the past month), and it is an incredibly dirty city (trash wise). Near my house, there is a corner where trash is dumped, and I think it is in expectation for it to be picked up. This pile never disappears. On days like today where it rains buckets, the piles start to float away. When you are in some of the poorer areas of town, you can smell it. It is the smell of sewage and rotting trash. It is tough, and I am finding it hard to rejuvenate myself. I feel my desire for calm and quiet are insatiable. I guess that is what the slump is, and it is a time of learning and stretching. I pray for the strength and patience to learn the lessons, rather than to just end up frustrated.

Some updates and a reflection

2010-01-17T16:31:00.002-07:00

The past few weeks have given me the opportunity to see two new parts of Bolivia. It was just what I needed. Santa Cruz can sometimes cause me to feel stuck, without any mountains to help me orient myself, without the cold fresh air I love, without the independence and freedom that every 24 year old American is accostomed to, and without friends and family that I have history with. Two weeks traveling, and I have been given all of those things. Just when I needed it. Thank you whoever figured that one out.

La Paz and Lake Titicaca

My last entry was Jenny and I finally getting out of Santa Cruz to La Paz, the following traveling stories won´t disappoint. La Paz was beautiful. That is mostly what we did, look at how beautiful it was. It is so completely different from Santa Cruz, it is hard to believe it is the same country after experiencing the small countries of Central America. Unfortunately for me, everything about La Paz attracted me, the cold air, the clothing (sweaters rather than skanky tops), the layout of the city, the people, and the general feeling. Sometimes I felt like I was in San Francisco, and sometimes like Portland, with the hilly, thin, cobblestreet roads, tall buildings, and momentary views of Illimani (huge mountain). Jenny and I with two other friends, Arelis and Kristen, spent a few days there seeing what we could. We visited the infamous Coca Museum and learned a lot about the plant at the middle of many conflicts and Evo Morales´ rose to power (he was a Coca Union leader). Kristen ended up sick from the altitute change, and we mostly shopped and looked around. After two days we went to Copacabana, the town on the Bolivian side of Lake Titicaca, with a sick Kristen (only one vomit out the window), on one of the scarier bus rides of my life. We arrived right around sunset, seeing it over the lake, then having some trout for dinner (amazing trout). It was a relaxing night. The surprise of the next day was that there are no cash machines in Copacabana. We had just enough money to take a boat to the Isla del Sol, come back, then get a bus back to La Paz. No room in the budget for eating. We heard there is one bank that gives cash advances on credit cards, but couldn´t seem to find anyone who could say exactly when it opened or closed (the guidebook failed on these details...among many others, i might do away with them), really meaning we heard many different stories. We took the chance, got on the boat to the island, that included an extra unexpected cost to get off the boat (no water now), hoping to find the bank open on return. The trip was worth it, food or not, and when we returned to Copacabana, the bank was open with a huge line. We had just enough time to get cash, eat, then run (yes, run) to the hostel to grab our things, throw them on a minibus, and head back to La Paz. I, at this point, am getting a little stressed out with the rushing around for everything. One more day back in La Paz, and then headed home.

This is when it really started..the adventure that is. We stopped to eat a little late right before heading to the bus terminal, and unfortunately for being past the Bolivian lunch hour, 45 minutes passed before recieving our food. We inhaled it, the grabbed a taxi (first bad decision). The taxi took maybe three times as long as walking would have taken to get to our hostel, mistake on my part catching it going the opposite way on a one way street. We called the terminal to ask the bus to wait, to which the lady said, " it is leaving in 5 minutes whether you are here or not." Our taxi driver snatched the phone out of my hand and made plans. Plans were to drive us to El Alto (the next city) so we could catch it there. We ran to the hostel, threw our bags in the taxi, and chased the bus up the mountain side (literally). When we boarded the bus in El Alto, we noticed a missing bag (bad decision two), which we didn´t pay enough attention to. The bus rides smoothly for a few hours, albeit with a smelly dog and loud family right behind Jenny and I. We stopped around 1 am, and are told by the bus driver there are land slides, and we can´t pass. That is all, for the next 8 hours. We woke up confused, noticing we hadn´t moved an inch, and took the time to get some breakfast and water. As Arelis and I were in a small venta, the busses start going, and we ran at least a quarter of a mile to catch up to ours (decision 3). Right when we get to it out of breath, they all stop. They say we have to wait another indefinite amount of time. So we are chatting about what to do if the road doesn´t open (Jenny´s flight was that night at midnight), when everybody starts running, and the road opens up for reals. The next 6 hours are smooth, and when we see the sign for Santa Cruz we feel in the clear. 5 minutes later we stop again, for a blockade. A political blockade has stopped both sides of traffic, 20 km outside of Santa Cruz. Clear I learned is at the destination:) After waiting an hour, we strap on our bags and walk to the other side and catch a taxi with some new friends. By this time we were friends with almost the entire bus, and met all the english speakers. We get back to MCC only 2 hours before Jenny needs to leave again. It made saying goodbye rushed, but I guess less difficult. Jenny left, which was a wierd feeling to be the person left, but I was blessed incredibly to have her come.

Sucre

I got back this morning from a Conference in Sucre. MCC was invited to the Third Congress of Youth in defense of water and the environment. Three youth from SEPA went, and I worked with them to prepare a presentation and a stand for a fair. The Congress was put on by UMAVIDA (Uniendo Manos for la Vida), who is a partner organization with Red Uniendo Manos of Peru (where companero Joe Tobiason works). Yes, Joe, along with other Peru volunteer Anna Gray were both present, with Jeff Upton who came with the US delegation, so we had a lovely Whitworth reunion.

The Congress was really fascinating, a ton of groups from Bolivian and Peru presented water and environmental problems they face, and what they are doing about them. The Congress is more or less focused on getting youth involved, which they were all doing some different extents. One of the great benefits at SEPA is they know how to get youth involved. Now I hope to be involved at working in the Environmental theme a bit more. That would include training, workshops, projects with environmental themes, using art to communicate the importance of water and caring for the environment, and networking youth with others around the same issue.

A lot of Peru and Bolivia have been subject to the emptying of their land of precious medals that have been sent straight back to Europe, where the people suffered greatly in work conditions and polluted cities. Today, they all suffer from continuing water problems from toxic waste from tailings that seep into their water. Europe´s wealth was built on the metals they imported from Latin America, from which came the modern Western world. It´s hard not to think that we have stepped on the poor to arrive where we are today in the West. I hope to write more about what I am reading on this topic soon. Stay tuned.

A Reflection

There is a paradox which goes, "nothing matters, so everything matters." Henri Nouwen writes on this, concluding with what keeps these together is the statement, "God Exists." He says, "All is now clothed in divine light and therefore nothing can be unimportant." It is a radical statment to make, exactly because everything then matters, while at the same time nothing matters because we believe that we would know what the future holds (a life forever with God), and that we have no control over what happens in this world (for example Haiti, no one can stop the natural disaster aspect of the tragedy). Throwing our hands up seems so tempting, and just living in the love of God, believeing that this is all we can really do with our lives. I have to be honest about my feelings, and that is that people who do this drive me crazy. I have to live in the humble reality that my efforts often are not in the most concientious manner. But we must try to live believing that everything is under the divine love of Christ, and everything matters. Everything we do matters, because with every decision we can choose to be aware of how it affects other people, how it affects the environment, and how it affects our ability to be critical. What can be done about all the contaminated waters that are causing illness throughout Latin America? I don´t know, but what we do matters.

Patience is a virtue, but also a fight.

2010-01-03T07:50:00.002-07:00

When I was a kid, I learned a quite catchy little song that taught the art of turning things back on yourself. The lyrics go, "have patience, have patience, don´t be in such a hurry, when you are inpatient, you only start to worry, remember, remember that God is patient too. Think of all the times when others have to wait for you." I have had to sing this song to myself many times in Bolivia, but the past few days have been special.

My sister is here visiting (woohoo), and we planned a trip to La Paz. We decided to travel on New Years day, and so I went to the bus terminal on New Year´s eve to buy tickets. Not a single bus line was open selling tickets, and after asking I find out not many bus lines have buses going out on New Years day. But there are some, one woman told me. Without any information, signs or anything to give any information to the desiring traveler, I decided to return the next day early to see. We were up till about 2 on New Years, and up at 7 to go to the bus terminal. The only people up were those still staggering around Santa Cruz with 2010 hats on trying to get home, or others trying to curb the hang over by cracking open another can of Pacena (national beer). I get to the terminal to find it the same way I did the previous day, as well as the next four trips. The only information that I had recieved all day was that, "they should be here, but I don´t know, maybe they are all still drunk." This meant that we couldn´t do much, because we had to run to the bus terminal every two hours. Finally the word came that nothing left till the next night, so Jenny and I gave in and paid the 100$ to fly to La Paz. It was definitely worth it, though my pocket feels empty now.

Jenny and I are in La Paz, and so far I am in love with the city. It has the hills of San Francisco, the mountains of Quito, the culture of, well, La Paz, and it is much cleaner and centered than Santa Cruz. Also, I am not sweating.

So patience is tough, but once you get what you need, it is all in the past. So, I guess what I have learned is that it is worth it. And like the song says, thousands of years of God´s patience puts it into perspective.

Back to enjoying this

2009-12-16T15:15:00.002-07:00

It has been more than a month since I last posted. Some of my dear friends can contest that it has taken me up to two months to reply to a simple email. The reason being that when I live a 30 minute bus ride away from free internet writing turns into more of a task than somewhere I can communicate what life is like. So I decided that paying 50 cents an hour for internet is worth it, and am heading around the corner from my house to post when I feel like it.

Just a little story from last night. The bus ride from my work office to my house is an hour long. This was an unfortunate night when I climbed onto a full micro, and got ready to stand for the next hour. About 20 minutes into the ride, in the middle of a busy street, the micro just stops. I thought, "I was waiting for this moment." I was curious to see how things would play out, because I know in my own country, riders would be off the bus in minutes after demanding their fare back, and stomping out to find the next fastest way to get home after a long day of work. Instead of that scenario, every single person stayed on the micro for 20 minutes as the driver played with a cable. After this 20 minutes he was unable to restart the micro, so he returned everybodies fare, and without hearing a single inpatient comment, we all stepped off and called down the next micro going our direction. I had no idea where I was when I stepped off, so after asking a woman standing close to me, she offered to walk me to a corner where another mirco that passes by my house goes so I had options. I am consistenly trying to play the time game here in Bolivia, purposely arriving 30 minutes late so that I don´t lose the half hour waiting for them to start, and many times I am let frustrated because I just can´t always play te game right. I don´t understand how to always plan for their perpective on time, and I find myself more frustrated than I thought I would be. But in this scenario, I saw the benefit of a culture that doesn´t see time as money. No one complaining, no one rude, everybody patiently waiting. It was nice.

A spanish music lesson

2009-11-12T10:41:00.000-07:00

One of the love-hate relationships I have with work is the amount of meetins and planning there is. The hate side is that I most of the time feel like I am nodding on and off through lectures. Anyone particularly worried about their grades knows how tortourous this feeling is. I sometimes put pressure on myself to be very attentive with my dictionary at hand, keeping up with the meeting. This is simply really exhausting. When I try to help out I realize how much I miss, and am mostly just trying to keep up. I feel really accomplished every time I can offer a single idea. At the leaderships camp coming up they are showing a movie, and they might be using a movie that I suggested, boo yah! What now?! Us volunteers usually end up being victims, given tasks we don’t understand, things we wouldn’t have the slightest idea of how to start. It’s great being a volunteer in another language.
The other side that I have loved about meetings is that because there is a problem with efficiency, there is a lot of down time for chatting. The other day myself with two co-workers went to one of their houses to plan part of the camp. We started thinking of songs to use for the a workshop on giving, and we started listening to a ton of music. The way a society thinks is translated through music, and this was my lesson that afternoon. Two of the artists we listened to a lot were Mana and Ricardo Arjona. Mana is one of the biggest spanish language music group from Latin America, coming from Mexico. Ricardo Arjona is also a big name in Spanish music, and the first things I learned about him while I was in Central America is that he has a song that has been banned in the United States. Some of the reocurring themes in both of these musicians music are the environment, politics (which frequently includes relationships with the United States), and most importantly, love. They have songs that talk about dying forests, the “blackness” of the future, contamination, and what the coming generations are going to be left with. The straight forward truth is that Latin America is suffers very directly from a contaminated environment. In Santa Cruz, the streets are paved with plastic bags, the rivers are filled with plastic soda bottles, toxins are breathed in by small children playing next to a burning pile of plastic and rubber, and the city smell gives away the truth about the sewer system. The environment is not being contaminated incognito. It is right in front of their faces, and everyone knows there is something that needs to be done. How does Latin America start to worry about trash when they continue to worry about getting food on the table? How do they spend time taking care of their trash when they are suffering from the dengue fever they caught from the mosquito that came from the puddle out back because the rains won’t stop, and unfortunately no one was thinking about proper draining when they put the roads in. Taking care of the environment sometimes feels like a privelaged way of thinking, though the truth is that it is one of the basic things that needs to be addressed to take care of people’s health. Since the environmental movement has become trendy, it sometimes feels like I’m being hipster when I get excited to see a sign about preserving the environment. In the US, we will see how long the trend lasts, we will see how long Gap puts out t-shirts made of recycled material. Latin America has the problems of the environment in their subconsience, because they see it everyday, not just in their profit margin over American Eagle. Thursday I am going to a used clothing market, mostly clothes imported from the US, which I am going to love because I will probably see (as a friend did) Burkenstocks for about 1.50$ (USD). But when I see that t-shirt about saving the environment, and know that someone probably got rid of it because the trend is passing, I will know what part I have played. Not the part of being a solution.
The second theme is that of politics, and two songs pop out. First, Despariciones by Mana. It is a song about the disappeare people during the Guatemalan civil war. The songs says, “Where have the disappeared gone? We’ve looked in the rivers, the forest, the lakes. Why have they disappeared? Why aren’t we all equal?” The US role in this story is huge. They were heavily involved in the entire history that lead up to the outbreak of a civil war, and then the training and implementing of the policies that lead to people disappearing. The following song is the one banned in the United States. It is from a very critical perspective, but we have to listen and know that this perspective exists. Here are the lyrics:
If The North Was The South
The north with their McDonald's, basketball and Rock'N Roll
Their topless bars, Madonnas, and stomach of Stallone
Tanned intellectuals, supermarket scholars
They have everything but haven't paid for anything.
With 18 you too young to have a drink in the bar
But you're man enough for war and to kill
Long live Vietnam and Forest Gump
Long live Wall Street and Donald Trump
Long live Seven Eleven
They powder their nose and use a syringe in their pockets
They travel with marijuana to understand the situation
Of this judge of the planet that throws an invitation
Court your spouse and you will win a reputation
Chorus:
The rods and stars take control of my flag
And our liberty nothing but a whore
And if the external debt steals our spring
To hell with geography borders are finished
If the north was the south would the Sioux be outcasts
Would being dark and indigenous be the popular look
Would Marcos be the Mexican Rambo
And Cindy Crawford the Mench of my countrymen
Reagan maybe a Samosan
Fidel would be an athlete running the stock market in Wall Street
And Che making Double Hamburgers
The yankees wetbacks to Tijuana
And the boats going from Miami to Havana, if the north was the south.
We would be the same or maybe a little worse
With the Falkland Islands by Greenland
And Disneyland in Guatemala
And Simon Bolivar letting out his secret
CHORUS:
The rods and stars take control of my flag
And our liberty nothing but a whore
And if the external debt steals our spring
To hell with geography borders are finished
If the north was the south, it would be the same crap
I would be singing Rap and this song would even exist.

Part of my goal here in Bolivia is to step out of the place where I don’t know what to do with this reality, and try to converse about it. That is sometimes the only answer, openess and dialogue.

2009-10-24T12:53:00.006-06:00

A couple of weeks ago, the SALT team and I had the fortunate opportunity to visit a Mennonite colony, 40 km south of Santa Cruz. We has no idea how the day was going to go, what we were going to see, or what we would learn. It is these exciting moments that make me very thankful for the opportunity I have to be here in Bolivia. Here are a few photos from that trip.

It´s hard to say what we learned from such a small encounter, so more I like to call it a glimpse into a exceedingly different life than I live. Some of the thoughts and comments included were, "it looks like Canada," (and yes it was from a Canadian), "are we in little house on the prairie?" and "wait, why does she have a digital camera?" Juxtaposition at it´s best. So what we did while we were there was chat with the family in their very dark house for a few minutes, trying to think of questions that would be appropriate or find common ground to start a conversation, then enjoying a great meal, which some of the actually Mennonite girls said included a few things their Mennonite families eat, followed by a tour of their property. The three boys mostly followed us around, ang giggled every time we made eye contact with them. The mutual culture shock was fun.

This was a 17 year old daughter, who stood out to us. She had a very outgoing personality, though we didn´t understand a word of what was said, her personality stuck out among her very shy sisters. I like this picture of her.

You can see a little more of the family here, with the beautiful horses they have. One of the interesting things about the Mennonites is that they are respected for their hard work and land ownership among Bolivians. They are seen as hard working and responsible business people.

Moving onto work related photos, this is the director of projects at SEPA. This meeting was of youth they have worked with in the past, planning events for the International Convention of Childrens Rights. Here he is lecturing on the history and importance of the convention. It included a little chat about perceptions adults have of children, and children have of adults. It was very interesting. Bascially, both have to change their perspections of the other.

Here is a group of the boys brainstormng ideas for the convention.

Presenting to the group ideas. What was decided on was 4 theatre presentations about childrens rights, a parade with costumes and messages about childrens rights, and some informational booths.

MCC workers watching the soccer at the retreat in Samaipata.

Planting of seedlings at the Organic Farm we visited in Samaipata. I cannot take credit for the photo, or the quality of camera that took it.

This is Corrie (tall blonde Calvin College grad), and her host sister at the end out our 13K. We represented the USA well in the Santa Cruz International race. We weren´t last!

"The day we empty the rivers, kill the last animal, deforest the last tree, then man will tell the story of how money can´t be eaten." That is my best attempt at the translation of this sign that hangs in one of the schools I work in.

And finally, here is a picture of the entire MCC Bolivia team. It is one of the largest MCC teams in the world. I work with a bunch of great people.

Love
allyn

Just Fotos

2009-10-12T15:28:00.004-06:00

I know that I have been writing a lot, so for today I am just going to put up images, because images are worth at thousand words:)

Dinner with my host family and friends at my house. We had the typical plate of meat, cheesy rice, yucca and salad (and soda).

A little birthday tea at my boss's house.

We had a MCC Bolivia retreat West of Santa Cruz, in a town Samaipata, which is a bit of a foreigner spot, with European hostels and bakeries, and us:)

We were able to visit an organic farm near the cabanas we were staying at in Samaipata, and it reminded me of Horton Rd Organics:)

Some Links

2009-10-11T13:24:00.002-06:00

Here are a few links I wanted to share.

This first is the general link to a website about the Infanto Juvenil, the youth festival that SEPA just finished. There are lots of pictures, some of which I may have taken! Just click here.

Here is a website of photos from the Infanto Juvenil. Click here.

Hope this gives you a little more of an image of the work and atmosphere here in Santa Cruz.

A Few Small Things

2009-10-06T19:08:00.005-06:00

“On earth as it is in Heaven” What does it mean, “On earth as it is in Heaven?” A few images from the past few weeks have made me think of this phrase. 1)On the Department of Santa Cruz’s anniversary, a very important day for the city and department, who seeks Autonomy to protect the profits from the abundant Natural Resources in the department. There was a large parade through the Central Plaza, and in the audience was the Vice President of the country (the Prez Evo hasn’t made a public appearance in Santa Cruz, the largest city in the country, in over two years), the mayor, and other imporant dignitaries. The start of the parade was the local police, and all the public servants (those who work for the municipal government). There was a lot of “Viva Santa Cruz,” and “Autonomia,” shouted from them. I am still trying to piece together thoughts on this, because it is a complicated issue that effects the people I live and work with. After that came perhaps all the venders in Santa Cruz. I was told that all the venders in the markets in Santa Cruz were invited to march, by the unions they are all members of. Many showed up. 2 hours worth. For 2 hours we watched the men and women who sit in the market, in pretty bad conditions, to sell the food we eat. Experiencing markets in Latin America are frequently a confusing thing. They are beautiful, full of colorful fruits and vegetables, and we see conditions we turn our heads from. At the parade, these venders took the day off, and we sat on the sidewalk while they were honored. People were complaining about how many there were, and how long the parade was, and so was I. But really, something was right in the world. 2)At the finale of the Infanto Juvenil, the winners of the dances and theatre presented their winning performances. One of the winners was a group from a home for developmentally challenged children. The presentation was a comination of dance, modern style with cloth and banners, and ribbons and everything that creates a “heavenly” feeling, if you know what I mean. The children were rolled around in wheelchairs, were layed in the cloth while music was playing. It was really powerful, bringing tears to my eyes. It was so much beauty surrounding these children that are seen as “poorly developed” or “deformed” etc... Something was right in the world. For an example of the work that the organization I work for, Fundacion SEPA, does, here is a really great one. I sat down with my boss, Raquel, to try to understand the Foundations work and how it is organized, with a translator (for the details is all...really;)) I wasn’t expecting as much as I got, and I felt like I was studying theory rather than the work of a youth foundation. The foundation works in areas, components, and geographical locations, all under the umbrella of a Project for the Formation of Participation. On top of that, there are 12 facilitators who all work almost independently, all with their own specialty, yet carrying out all the components and focusing on all of the areas. Whoa. Though it takes a little to take it all in, I can see how this organization allows space for all of the facilitators (a team of 12 that carries out the Foundations work, and what immediate boss, Raquel is) to use maximum creativity, and carry out their work in a way that is appropriate for those they work with. Their philosophy is that they support and help promote youth to use their talents and rights to become active member of their communities. This story is an example of how this happens. Three times during the Infanto Juvenil (youth festival SEPA helped organized) I saw a theatre presentation from a colegio (high school). I didn’t completely understand the theatre while watching it, but I knew it was about a blockade, or protest about the living conditions near the city dump, and the characters were migrants. The city of Santa Cruz has a lot more money than the rest of the country due to natural resources, so there has been and continues to be huge migration from the poorer highlands in the west into the Santa Cruz. The play was an interaction between the protesters, the media, and the mayor. When talking through things with my boss today, I got a more complete story of the theatre and its purpose. The colegio that presented actually is right on the edge of the city dump. The play they presented was nothing imagined, but very real. The blockade is a real event their community members had been a part of. After assuming it was simply a presentation of what does happen, I learned from Raquel that it was a critique to those involved in the blockade. The play started with what actually happened, which didn’t work. The second half was their idea for a different route for expression and demanding their needs. Their idea was to invite the mayor to the community, allow him to experience the dump himself, and then resolve the conflict without needing to use police, military, or bribery. What I watched was the youth of the community using the venue of theatre to communicate a critique and offer an alternative route for both the adults and the authorities of their community. As one person put it, “youth, you are the future, but more importantly, you are the present.” These students won a second place prize in theatre, which will give them some resources to continue working on a project of cleaning up their school. All I can really say is, that the goals of SEPA are very clearly becoming reality in this example. The youth are taking control of their reality through alternative venues.

A Little Bit of Everything

2009-09-21T16:08:00.003-06:00

Hi All,

I just got off the phone with my mom, and found out that it is likely that our sweet, beautiful, white, fluffy, wonderful dog is most likely lost in the forests south of Gallup. Good, I needed a reason to cry. With feeling a little bit overwhelmed and like I can't quite communicate what I want to say to EVERYONE around me, I am now thinking of our sweet little dog and I know I will cry tonight. When people are crying all around me, and I stare at them feeling bad I can't identify with their tears, now I have something to push the tears over the levees.

This post is a Bit of Everything. I have labeled each section, so that you can jump to the section you want to read. I know some have more interest in some areas, so if you don't want to read about my job, you can easily skip it in this post. But, reading this post on my job will give you more information for later posts, so I hope you do read it:)

Mennonites

What would it be like to see a Grizzly Bear in Bolivia? I don’t know. I think it would be pretty crazy. It would be so hard to make sense of why there is a grizzly bear in Bolivia. Did it walk down from Alaska, was it brought here by bus, by plane, by train? How the heck does it live here? I am making a terrible analogy for what it is like to see traditional Mennonites walking down the street in Santa Cruz, Bolivia. And I have just as many questions about them as about the grizzly bear. Mennonites live traditionally all over the world; the United States, Canada, Mexico etc.. The most traditional of them all are here in Bolivia. 60,000 of them. Here in Santa Cruz they are seen frequently. MCC here has a program for the low-German speaking Mennonites, providing resources and assistance for their general benefit. Also, they come in from their colonies to business here, like sell cheese and butter, and buy what they need. I have experiences culture shock a few times, but there is something special and different about the culture shock of seeing four tall, very blonde boys in blue overalls, hats, and plaid shirts walking down the street in Bolivia. They speak an unwritten language, they don’t talk much with the people here, and they stare at us. It’s a funny experience to be stared at by someone who you are staring at. Both of us are strangers in this land, and both of us stare at the other. Funny that we both carry the same label, “Mennonite.”
This label causes a lot of confusion for people, and you can’t blame them. The Mennonites have had a presence here in Bolivia for about 60 years, and during that time have made themselves famous for the cheese and butter they make, how closed off their lives are, and also most recently for making International headline news. All of these definitions of Mennonites are also put on us, and then we get to explain the difference between us and them. Which is hard because I know so little about them. I will learn more, because in a few weeks we are going to get our own opportunity to visit a colony. I am pretty excited to jump into a new culture here in Bolivia. Some of you may have seen an article on BCC about Mennonites in Bolivia recently, here is the link: http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/8117905.stm Simply, there are problems, and it is complicated.

Family

I am comfortably set up with a family here. It is a family of 5. The two oldest kids are girls, Paula who is 21, and Rebecca who is 19, and then Bernabe who is 17. I share a bedroom with Paula. My first impression of the house was that it was very peaceful and comfortable. They have a large patio in the front, with mango trees and a hammock, and the house is open and airy. It’s very comfortable. I have had some not-so restful nights, due to the quickly changing weather and small insects, that though I know are important for the ecosystem, fill an important niche blah blah, have no purpose when it comes to me trying to sleep. Luckily, Bolivia has a quite nifty invention. I call it the raquet of death. Basically it looks like a tennis racket, but all of the strings are electric, so when they swap a bug, it zaps and kills it. The first fly I saw them kill caught on fire, sparked a lot, and finally fell out. It seemed a little morbid at first, but now it feels great to swap a mosquito with it. One of the first few nights I woke up with mosquitos flying around my head, and tried to keep the sheet between my face and their stingers. But to no avail. I woke up with 5 new bites on my face.
Other important things about my host family... they are a evangelical family. In Latin America this means mostly their church is frequent and loud. Some evangelical families attend church 4-5 times a week. My familes sticks to 2 services, with also nightly devotions. Though I enjoy the energy at the church, the volume of the singing and the volume at which the preacher talks are both a little much for me. I feel like I am being yelled at, and I don’t know why because I can’t understand him at the rate he speaks. I don’t think we will go there every Sunday. I have connected more and more with my family, we joke a lot, I have gotten a few nicknames, and my host brother and I fight a little. This makes me feel like a part of the family. I will post pictures later...when I take a few.

Work

I started work this week. I work for an Organization called Fundacion SEPA. It is an organization that MCC is partnering with, which means they have given them some funds to print Conflict mediation booklets, and they have loaned them me. Basically MCC pays me, but I don’t report to them at all. I am a full time volunteer for SEPA. I get time off to go to MCC retreats, and other fun activities. MCC is works mostly through partnerships, because as it was said, “other organizations are doing work we would like to do, but doing it much better than we ever could.” They do research in youth rights, they help develop school governments, teach conflict mediation, and provide a place for youth to express themselves through art. It is a lot, and I am still working at understanding how it is all done. For the next few weeks the Foundation is putting on a Youth and Children festival that allows the youth of Santa Cruz to compete for awards in Poetry, photography, painting, singing, theatre, sculpture, and others. Right now, the student governments of many high schools and middle schools are in a project competition. It is kind of like a business plan competition, where projects made to improve schools with themes of preventing violence, becoming more environmentally friendly, educating about HIV/AIDS, and improving health. The schools have been presenting their projects this week. I believe there are going to be a total of 40+ presentations. Three winners are chosen, and those three win a cash prize to implement their projects. To watch these teenagers present projects they have created on these types of themes has been very cool. I know that I didn’t have the maturity to talk about and work on these themes at that age. What is the unfortunate reality here and most of the developing world is that there aren’t systems in place to protect children. Schools aren’t always a safe place for them, they are victims of physical violence, sexual violence, and psychological violence. Through these projects they are standing up for their own rights, not waiting for the day to come when someone else will. It gives me an opportunity to reflect both on the privelage I had growing up, how safe my life has been, and to aks the question of what do I have to offer for the kids I will be working with? I come from a country where these things aren’t of major concern. Though I wasn’t always a teenager who raced home to wathc TV, rather going to work, sports practice etc... I didn’t spend my time worrying how to demand my rights of a life without violence. I can bring hope of a life without violence, and I hope that I can learn how that can help. One of my favorite projects was a school that has a garden. For the presentation they brought in their vegetables, and made a salad that we all tasted. It was exciting, and gave me hope that I can get my knees dirty in a garden this year.
One of the areas of focus that SEPA has teach youth alternatives in resolving conflicts, and a different way of expressing their needs. These alternatives include art, theatre, music, and dancing. We learned in Cochabamba that due to the oral tradition of the Indigenous, they use protest, blockades etc.. to communicate their needs (when we use petitions and written communication in the United States). This is much more prone to violent responses from the government or opposition. Art, theatre etc.. are ways they can continue to use public avenues to communicate their needs. The work they do to respond to their society is creative and I have already seen it at work through the projects. I am inspired through them. I hope I can find personal purpose in the organization as time continues.

Personal Thoughts

Henri Nowen writes in Gracias, “Can we be true Christians without being considered to be subversives in the eyes of the oppressors?” Who are the oppressors in Bolivia? That is largely up to perspective. Bolivia suffers form a bit of a split in the country. I live on one side of that split. It is harder than I thought it would be to come into the lives of people who hold beliefs about a large part of the country that has historically been the oppressed. How difficult it is to walk into a country that has a lot of systems in place, that from far away we can criticize with such ease. When I am here, I am a foreigner and a learner. I am here to listen to what people have to say, and not say anything back. That is going to be hard. Not that I am going to say something, but I am worried that I am going to form ideas, or opinions about people who say these things without thinking of them in the best light possible.
I read a book called “Vultures and Butterflies,” written by a former MCC volunteer who spent one year in Bolivia, then 10 years in El Salvador. Much of the book is about her dealing with the realities of war, the death of both of her parents, and her place as a health worker. She gives some very important and interesting insights into low-intensity conflict, and how humanitarian assistance can fall into that category, and how she was viewed because she was a foreginer working with the church. I found that I identified with something she wrote toward the end of the book, something that spoke to some of my struggles. Here is the excerpt:
“I have been trying to unsteal my heart. The barriers went up to protect myself, to keep the pain out of the vulnerable center of my being. Ironically, though the very act of self-protection is now smothering me. The armor needs to be dismantled.
As I let go of the armor crushing my heart and sink deep into the darkness, I realize there is another, deeper reality. I begin to sense not a bright light, but an illuminating glow. A warmth like the dawn, waiting in hope to transform the night. Then I know that even the darkness is encompassed by tenderness and mercy.
When I treat myself with the same gentleness and compassion with which God treats our world, I in a small way encompass the darkness of my failures, pain, doubts, and insecurities. They don’t disappear but their boundaries are defined by gentleness. Within the boundaries of my own darkness there is room for the pain, doubt, and fear of others.”

And another quote that I liked:

“I’m actually being stretched between the poles of one world created whole by God, yet cut and divided by human beings as we compete for power and control.”
She quoted Parker J. Palmer, another quote I liked:
“Boldly become a pole of opposition; live the contradiction. The false crosses will fall away, while those we must accept will stay there in the middle of our lives, pulling right and left, up and down, until they pull us open at our true center, a center where we are one with God, a center which we find only on the way of the cross.”

Thanks all for reading, for investing time into understanding my life.
Allyn

Hopefully you can see my swollen eye and new face accessory.

The Inaguaration of the Infanto Juvenil

The Garden Project I mentioned

This is a picrture of one of the projects, it was an anti-discrimination project.

2009-09-06T12:51:00.003-06:00

I have never really been an impulsive person. Spontaneous? At times. Random? Sure. Impulsive? Not really the word to describe myself. This week, I learned that impulsion comes streaming out when I have things weighing on my heart. The victim of this impulsive decision? My nose.

The other side of the decision is that there really is no consequence to piercing my nose. It was cheap, it is only a whole in my body (those usually close up in time), it is one of the least stereotyped piercings, and I wasn't the only one doing it. The point to this post is not to simply tell you I did a very "american going crazy abroad" thing, but rather the things that made the decision of no consequence.

Some of the questions daily present during my time have included: How does sin manifest itself in me? How have I turned into such a sinful person? Why does Evil exist? Why did God allow Job to suffer so much? Does hell really exist? Why is there so much suffering in the world? Why don't I suffer like others do? Do I commit a sin every time I ignore a begging hand in the streets? What can it possibly mean to my life that children sniff glue because we can't distribute food properly? When there is so much suffering, why are so many people complaining about the President making a speech to the students in the United States?

Some of these questions take a lifetime to answer. That is one of the few things I have. A lifetime.

Since my last update, we have moved back to Santa Cruz from Cochabamba. After a day at the MCC offices, I am moving in with my host family today. I am happy it is finally the day, because I just want to get the first day over with. Things slowly become better over time, so I am happy to get some of the first few weeks done with. In a week, I will start my job. O gosh. Someone I was chatting with yesterday asked about my job, I told him, "I will be helping a group teach conflict resolution in the public schools in Santa Cruz." His response was, "what has prepared you to do this?" I haven't had anything, is the answer. I will have to figure out how my life skills have prepared me to fill this volunteer position. That figuring out will happen very slowly, I expect. Again, I am just happy to get that started.

Our last week in Cochabamba ended well. We visited a theatre group that does "social theatre." They presented a three part show, the first section was about the conquest, the second about a conflict in Sucre, and the third about a civilian conflict in Cochabamba. It was very powerful, for reasons other than the subject matter, they were a group of high schoolers who had written and presented material that is very controversial, very serious, and they did it very well. Besides being privelaged to not have to think about these types of serious matters, many young Americans are protected from these serious matters. We really don't do ourselves a favor in doing this.

We also visited The Democracy Center. This was a great visit for three reasons. First, because the executive director gave us some really interesting information about Bolivia. He explained Bolivia, as one of many South American countries that are going through a time he described as "experimental." For the first time in the history of many Latin American countries, left leaning presidents have been elected. Every country has uniquely been under control of foreign powers and dictators, and so they are all trying to reverse some of the damage done in unique ways. He explained in like watching a child grow up. They must figure many things out for themselves, like the United States did while they were a young country. Many of the countries are not being given the freedom needed to grow to maturity on their own, and others are being pegged incorrectly. I don't have mature or developed ideas about Bolivia, but I sometimes think that you can compare it to a teenager who gets a piercing (or an American who will be moving into a religious Bolivian family). There are lots of ideas of what it means to have a piercing, and they are different for many people. What it really means can either be complex (identifying oneself with a culture, acting out against parents) or can be simple (they like how it looks). Bolivia, in electing an Indigenous president who is clear that he wants to give them back many rights that have been taken from them, and being buddy with Hugo, has sent off many messages. Which one is true? If we get to know the situation, and watch it while it grows, we may learn to understand it better. We must keep ourselves pegging the country into a certain category. Jim Shultz (director of the center) said, "always think that you don't know what the hell is going on." Similarly to trying to figure out what is going on within a teenagers head.

Secondly, one of the lady's who is currently working there is a Whitworth alumn! and a former CASPer. She was a participant on the 1990 trip. We figure this out because as she was talking to our directors from MCC, she explained she had a connection with MCC Bolivia through a friend, Krista Hunt Ausland. As some of you know, she is the daughter of Jim Hunt, a professor of mine who took us to Central America. His daughter served here in Bolivia with MCC in 1998. She was killed in a bus accident a few months into her term, and her parents have since started a foundation, the Krista Foundation. Her story impacted me a lot, because my family has also experience tragedy through someone who was living abroad. What a connection to make. I was blessed to be able to make connections through these many amazing things that have been a part of my life.

We lastly visited a catechist center, where young people from the campo are trained to teach the word of God. The chapel at this center was filled with paintings done by an Indigenous, they all tell the stories of the Bible to illiterate lay persons. It was beautiful, and I wanted to share some of the pictures.

We finished up school in Cochabamba, and took a 11 hour bus ride back here. Now on to new host families. Thank you to all who read!

2009-08-28T11:36:00.000-06:00

A few thougts from a few activities this past week.

On saturday, our SALT clan, along with two students from Switzerland, traveled to what are the "most important Incan ruins after Machu Pichu." It´s funny what you expect when you read something like that. Though the statement is very true, along with the fact that "the biggest room ever found in the Americas" is at the place called Incallajta, I was expecting something out of this world. I guess my imagination needs to catch up with my expectations. The ruins were realy spectacular, with most of them still underground, and much more destroyed than Machu Pichu (and also in a dry valley rather than a majestic mountain top). The room that is the biggest room of any ruins in the americas is 80-something meters by 24ish (I wasn´t taking notes CASP style). After the big room (which I didn´t completely understand was used for) we walked down to the sacrificing stone. It reminded me of when I was at Stonehedge, and the sacrificin stone was right there staring at me, and for some reason I was totally freaked out. Is it just me or is there something creepy about a rock where they (still today) put a llama, cut off it´s head, take the blood that is spurting out of its jugular vein and sprinkle it around on the ground, burn the body, and then feast on the meat? We were invited back for the Summer solstice sacrifice on December 21, and I think we will stick the more typical Chrismas celebrations in Bolivia at that time. The part of the religion and culture that I could identify with a little more was the view of God. Like the Christian trinity (this is how they explained it) they have the Father who is the sky, the son who is the land, and the spirit who is in everything. The celebration is one of gratitude. They are thankful for the wind, the rain, the earth, the sun, the seeds, and everything else that allows them the harvest they have. It made me think, When was the last time that I was grateful for the rain, because it allows me to eat and live? The culture of gratitude is a eucharistic sort of life, and one that is required of us as Christians. What is it in my life that is as foundational, and sustaining and life giving that I can give thanks for. Here in Bolivia, I am thankful for community. This program has put me right into one that is strong, supportive, and very real. For this, I am thankful.

On the road home from the ruins, we were driving through a valley, right on the edge of the rain shadow. This is a mountain range where on one side there is a rainforest, and when the clouds travel upwards over the mountains, they drop all there moisture, causing the other side of the range to be dry. I saw a peak of the start of this rainforest, and dreams of bromeliads and epiphytes streamed into my mind.

The next day we attended a churcha, and climbed the hill on which lies the Cristo of something (I don´t remember). It is in a similar shape of the Cristo in Rio de Jainero, but this Cristo is a few centimeters taller (and was built later:)). The say in Rio that Christ lived 33 years. In Cochabamba, they say he lived 33 years, plus a little more. It was good for us to climb to Christ, in a bit of a symbolic pilgrimage, as we were feeling homesick and sometimes overwhelmed last week. That afternoon I got to attend a game between the two local soccer teams, and had a great time. The fans weren´t quite as crazy as those in Guatemala, but nonetheless, very fun.

We visited a convent earlier this week, and learned mostly about the life of the nuns in the Carmelite order. St. Teresa of Avila was the reformer of this order, and from her deep spirituality the rules for the convent were made. They took a vow of silence, of poverty, and of celibacy. Some at the age of 12. The parents paid the dowry of what is worth 100,000 USD today, and they were educated and kept healthy and safe. Though this high calling is very respected and in many ways beautiful, it is also not for all. The second daughter of rich families were required to join a religions order, so some of the nuns were not there by choice. There were tunnels under the convent that met with the monestary for those who had trouble keeping their vows.

Sometimes it is nice not to have to explain where you are from. Our guide at the convent was a volunteer from the University of San Francisco, who lived n Gallup and attended Gallup Catholic for a year. We got a few good laughs that a place like Gallup could connect us.

Last thing I am going to talk about was a meeting we had last night. As a part of our orientation, we are visiting a few different organizations around Cochabamba in order to learn more about Bolivia. Last night we spent a few hours at a place called ¨"Fundacion Ghandi." By the name you can guess they are an organization focused on peace, and what the guy we met with said, "we are about peace WITH justice, not about a peace that exists in cemetaries, but one that addresses the lives of the peole living in Bolivia." We learned a ton about Bolivia. They started by showing us a video about the Gas War in 2003, where the public rioted against the President (Goni) who was selling all the natural gas through Chilean ports. It was a breaking point of the economic structure that had been present in Bolivia for a few decades, and when a president sent all of Bolivias natural resources out of the country, the people stood up and said no. This left 60+ people dead in a few days, and ended when the President fled to Washington DC (were he remains to today, waiting to be tried). Evo emerged as the leader after he left, and was then elected in 2005. He is the first leftist President the country has had. The guy at the organization was very smart, and gave us a very useful explanation of some of the structures of politics, land ownership, economics and natural resources in Bolivia. They specifically work in research and teaching classes and seminars to the public, mostly youth, about racism (which is a big issue here), discrimination, rights, and conflict resolution. This is along the lines of what I will be doing, so it was exciting, and gave me some energy and hope for this job that I am jumping into. I was very very thankful to meet people who are so active, passionate, and involved in changing the society of Bolivia. My feelings after were very different from those I felt after lectures on CASP, because I knew tha the organization that I am working with supports the work of this organization, and we have similar goals. I feel blessed. Very blessed.

Love to you all,
Allyn

Week 1

2009-08-21T12:20:00.002-06:00

Hello from Cochabamba,

I have safely been in Bolivia for almost a week now, and the week has included three very different places. From Akron Pennsylvania, we traveled overnight to Santa Cruz, with a small layover in La Paz. We landed in La Paz, or in El Alto which sits on the plateau above La Paz, where the airport is, at about 5 am. This set us up at the perfect time to watch the sunrise. The sky grew from black to a rainbow of purple, pink and yellows. It was by far the most incredible sunrise I have ever seen. I took it as a small blessing to comfort me during the long travel. Then as we took off from El Alto, we saw the snow capped mountains that surround La Paz, and it was a second incredible sight. I wasn´t expecting such a beautiful and dramtic mountain scenery. La Paz holds the title of the Capitol with the highest elevation, as well as capitol with the most dramatic scenery I have seen.

Then we landed in the drastically different city of Santa Cruz, and walked out to palm trees, and high temperatures. Santa Cruz is a tropical city on the other side of the country. Lynn and Lorie Longnecker, and their three kids, who are about ages 4, 6 and 9 pìcked us up. I can´t help but picture my own family in Ecuador with Will, Jenny and I at about these ages living in South America. It gives me a little connection to them, though they don´t know it. They work in the Peace and Justice Department of MCC Bolivia, and are in charge of the SALT program here. We went straight to the MCC headquarters and spent the next few days doing some orientation to Santa Cruz, and MCC´s work in Bolivia. We met most of the team in Bolivia, including the Representatives, who are from Nicaragua and Honduras, many locals, a family from Canada, and a few other workers from the United States.

There are a few things about MCC Bolivia, and MCC in general that struck me. Bolivia has a little bit of a split between the wealthier East, and the poorer Indigenous West. Though this is a drastic simplification of the situation, it helps understand what direction MCC is going here. They have been centered in Santa Cruz since the 50´s, mainly because they were working with the low-german speaking Mennonites who live in Colonies in the Santa Cruz region. MCC is working to move some work, or starting some work in the West. Us studying in Cochabamba is a small step to start to build connections in the West. We have already made a small connection, which is that one of the teachers at the language school we are at participated in the IVEP program, which is the volunteer program for young adults from countries where MCC works to go to the United States and Canada to volunteer. We are going to church with her on Sunday, where we will hopefully learn more about her and her connection to MCC.

MCC Bolivia is very large, and they have many connections with local organizations. All of the SALTers, except for one, will be working with Bolivian agencies. This lines up with the MCC´s goal to make connections with agencies working for a similar goal. MCC also works with a program that brings together the many churches in Bolivia (Catholic, Protestant, Evangelical, Mennonite etc..). These connections are considered an important part of the peace work they do. SALT falls under this heading as well. I am excited and a little surprised that what we do is considered Peace work. It is simple connections that bring people together, and help us work together rather than work against one another.

Language school has been good thus far. It is similar to language school I did in Guatemala, but a much smaller and more intimate school. The directors are great, and they know all the students there are really help us get to know the city and set up small trips. Hopefully we will be going to some Incan ruins this weekend, which are said to be the largest in the area.

As for how I am feeling personally, I feel like I am ready to jump in a little more. I am working at being patient, because I know these first few weeks are going to be important for building relationships with the other girls, nad those will be important relationships that last throughout the year. I do feel a little without my regular support, but I know I will always feel that gap in my heart, and will learn to find support in other ways. Some of the other SALTERS have been feeling a little more homesick than I have, so I would ask for prayer that we can find some comfort that we are not doing this alone, and for peace about the next year to grow in our hearts.

One thing I have been blessed with so far, is the girl that I was placed in hte homestay with here in Cochabamba. It isn´t often that I have found someone to talk about my faith with. We have some similarities in our struggles, but still many differences. I have been simply blessed with a place to express myself and talk about the things I struggle with. It helps me to not internalize or ignore it.

I haven´t taken many picture so far, so as soon as I do, I will post them. Thank you all for your support.

Love
Allyn

Bolivia or Bust!

2009-08-15T08:24:00.003-06:00

Today is the departure day. Five other girls and I will board a plane and land in Santa Cruz, Bolivia tomorrow morning. While we are doing that, over 100 other volunteers will be traveling to places like Manitoba, Alberta, California, Kansas, Virginia, New York City, Cambodia, Vietnam, India, Tanzania, Kenya, Brazil, Nicaragua, Honduras, and many more. We all go in to serve in the name of Christ, with a common committment to the values as set by the Mennonite Central Committee, which are to love God, serve people, live simply, seek justice, be committed to peace, and invest in creating a more peaceful world.
We were asked this week the questions, “why are you going?” Then, “why are you really going?” Finally, “why are you really really going?” I responded to many answers that I felt were unencompassing, such as, 1) I would like to live abroad for longer than I have before, 2)I have many thoughts, questions, and soul searching to do after spending four months in Central America, 3)I desire to serve as I feel God has called me 4)I want to do this before grad school. Unsatisfied as I was with these answers, I thought a little more and came up with something that reflects more simply and clearly why I am really going. That is because I want to be a part of the solution rather than a part of the problem. Of course I will never stop being part of the problem, because I am completely bound by this thing called sin, I do have the opportunity to work right now to learn how I can be more a part of the solution.
Thank you all for your support up to now. I know I am surrounded by support, love, and prayer, which gives me some confidence to go into something I feel completely unqualified for. I think a lot in terms of how do I figure out life, how do I make everything fit in perfectly, what does everything mean for the bigger picture. A quote that was shared with us this week really spoke to this side of me. This quote refers to North Americans, and says, “We look at life as a problem to be solved, rather than a mystery to be lived.” This is the lesson I am currently leanrning.

For some fun or informative stuff, check out the video below. We had an international music night, and we drew on the collection of talents here, and found someone to teach a few girls a special dance. Here is the video of us performing for the volunteers.

Here are a few websites with articles, or pictures from Bolivia, which I was planning on posting last post, but didn’t, and never ended up changing the title. (click on the words)

National Geographic
BBC

Thank you all, and please keep me updated on your lives!
Blessings,
Allyn

A few Websites to check out

2009-08-09T18:42:00.002-06:00

We made it to MCC headquarters in Akron, Pennsylvania! It is a beautiful, calming, and humid. What a great place to relax, and I think it will be a great place to re-entry into, though I don't know why I am thinking that far in advance.

We did some meet and greet today, had a chapel service, and then learned a lot about the MCC. What impressed on me most, was that the MCC is a movement, meaning that it grows when people have a desire and call to help somewhere. They have had many programs that have allowed conscientious objectors (people who refused to join the military) to serve in another capacity. Our orientation is at the same time as the IVEP orientation, which is a volunteer programs for young adults from abroad (Etheopia, Indonesia, China, Argentina, Nicaragua etc..) to volunteer in the United States. I think that there is a beautiful reciprocity that is occurring here, and we have many diverse faces.

I will continue to update when I can.

Three Diet Cokes

2009-08-08T21:32:00.002-06:00

This time around on the blog, I know that updates will tend to bore and overwhelm people with the details that I may even find dull and repetitive. So, though I am not the best of story tellers, I will try at the talent I always wish I had.

My biggest fear going into today was an overwhelming feeling of loneliness. I left Will, Sarah, and the baby, whose head I knocked a few too many times yesterday, at the hotel at 4:30 this morning to head off to my 6 am flight to Harrisburg Pennsylvania. I left my family earlier this week, and have talked to many dear friends, for the last time (while in the US, which really won't change a dramatic amount). I boarded the plane, found my seat between two girls about my age, and got ready to sleep for the next 3 hours. The friendly looking girl sitting next to me asks, "are you from Portland?" I answer, "no," and then the required "I am from New Mexico, and just drove up here in the past few days. Are you?" She says yes, and then, "I am headed to Akron Pennsylvania." I knew at that moment, that I had just sat down next to someone who was headed the exact same place I was, and that the dooming loneliness was suddenly gone. I had a friend. A stranger, yet already a friend. And this was less than a minuted into my trip. What? How could this have happened? She is a graduate of Seattle Pacific, and is headed to Vietnam.
One hour after boarding, we get off due to a fuel pump problem, and then start the long day of re-booking, and waiting. The stranger on my other side, a 28 year old young professional, offers us help with a phone number that allows us to bypass the number system and rebook our flights to Pennsylvania, and then stays to make sure everything works out. After figuring out details, we end up propped against a wall, chatting and laughing for the next 6 hours till our flight finally decides to leave Portland. All I have to say is that my day that I thought would be filled with loneliness and worry, went by quickly because it was filled with two new friends. When the beverage cart came by we ordered three diet cokes, searched for Alicia's ipod that ended up being stuck in the cuff of her pants, searched for Alicias passport that was found folded up in her papers, and then missed our connecting flight in Chicago.

Now I am heading for a 6am flight out of Chicago. We will get to orientation late, start a lot of new relationships and learn a lot of new information, and hopefully have a few more little moments that remind me that it is the little things that will matter this year. Like three diet cokes.

Speak

2009-04-23T02:21:00.001-06:00

This is going to be a very short post, but hopefully it will fall into the quality category, yet I never am very eloquent.

To speak. To listen. To silence oneself. To think. To hear. To feel. To feel the shade you were looking for. To feel compassion through a stranger's words. To be inspired. To do. To learn.

I have listened this past week, to many who can speak about what they do, what they experience, and what they feel. I don't speak out loud about these things that are in myself. Sometimes I can't get through the maze of thoughts. Thank you to all who do, you create in me the belief that my emotions exist for a reason, though perhaps not to be spoken, but to slowly be turned into a living mosaic.

"Si Se Pude"

2009-04-03T16:13:00.000-06:00

"Si Se Pude" was chanted enthusiastically during my most recent travel to El Salvador. I am familiar with "Si Se Puede," the chant and slogan from the American Farmworkers Union. When I heard the former, it created an immediate solidarity between the struggling people of Latin American decent. "Si Se Pude" is in response to the peaceful election of Mauricio Funes of the FMLN in El Salvador on March 15th. What is the struggle that led up to this emotion election for many? Hundreds of years of oligarchic control, massacres, a 12 year Civil War, and 20 years of governmental control by the remnants of the oligarchic elite. This struggle is not mine, nor is it something easy for me to understand, but the things I heard and the emotion I saw in the faces of many Salvadoran people couldn't help but bring a tear to my eye. Though the future of the country is uncertain, and perhaps a new government that will fall victim to power and greed has will take control on June 1st, the hope present in the people is a true, real, fought for hope for change to a corrupt and poverty stricken country.

I had the unique privelage of observing the elections, and inspired by a fellow traveler, I want to list some of the highlights.

1. Traveling with three of the greatest people, and greatest spanish speakers I know.

2. A list of people who hosted us and helped us along the way down: Mark in Daly City, Andre in Los Angeles, Alex? at the airport, Abner at the Hotel, the very many taxi drivers, Evan with the FMLN, the driver who took us from the party headquarters and found the house we were staying at, for free.

3. Our close to loosing our passports experience at the Guatemala-El Salvador border. At one point, I was surrounded by 7-10 men yelling at me in spanish to give them 10$, my passport in their hands, and unable to communicate with my fellow travelers. In the end we all got our passports back, for free, except for a terrible exchange rate Cheri got from one of them.

4. Sonia, a FMLN party volunteer who lives in the United States. She was the first one to show me the deep emotion many Salvadorans share regarding the election. She shared with us some information, thanked us for being there (me, thanked?), and explained to us how much this elections means for all Salvadorans.

5. La Mora. I returned, accompanied by the wonderful Travis, to La Mora where I along with 12 other students spent 4 days with while we were in El Salvador. I got to talk with my family, see my absolutely adorable host sister Sintia, and be reminded of the place where I learned about the Civil War.

6. Freddy. My host mom in La Mora's cousin, who took Travis and I back to San Salvador from La Mora after the buses stopped coming due to a political rally in Suchitoto. An ex-gang banger who grew up in South Central LA and now lives with his family in El Salvador and works in the cooperative that owns a bus route, he is an ARENA supporter, but who also spoke of the losses his family endured during the war. He also accused Travis and I of being Frentedoras, lying that we were nuetral observers. He took us to dinner at the mall (what happens often with gringos) and bought us a huge meal, and then offered to take us to some hot springs, all on him (we didn't take him up on this). He also had the single cutest little girl in the world.

7. Kriscia and Joselyn. Two FMLN volunteers and college students at the Universidad Nacional. They were kind of like us, college students, but they knew El Salvador and the politics in a very experienced day, and answered any questions we had, recovered Glen's water bottle, and basically took care of everything we ever asked of them. I miss them. Luckily, we have facebook!

8. Seeing Rigoberta Menchu. Though she has very mixed reviews from Central Americans, she is a symbol of Indigenous rights in Guatemala. When she was first spotted, Cheri says, "That woman just looks soo Guatemalan." After I saw who it was, we decided that it was probably because she is the most famous Guatemalan on earth.

9. FMLN Celebration. Roberto and his buddy, two people who you could jus tell ruled the streets of San Salvador during the war, knew everybody, and knew where the action was happening. They dragged us around the celebration, even up onto the stage where the newly elected President and Vice President later spoke, introducing us to famous party memebers (who we had no idea who were), and attempting to introduce us to Funes himself. Although this didn't acutally happen, we did snag pictures of the President-elect.

10. Pupusas. For 30-60 cents a pop, we enjoyed these as often as we could. I went to a Tacqueria in Portland, and they had pupusas on the meny. 3$ each, and then I knew I was home.

11. Sumbling into a press conference with the ARENA candidate, Avila, at the Radisson Hotel.

12. The many converations we had with people, their opinions of the elections, people who have lived in the United States and understand the difference between how I live and how they live. These are the people who forgive me for what I have, who love and accept us for the differences we many times cannot change, and whose lives are the voice of the things I cannot change about my identity.

13. A day at the beach. Biology class videos, Cheri beating me at "first to the marble," sunburns, Ceviche, a crazy fair, and seeing the way beaches in El Salvador aren't protected from pollution they way we hope (the reality of environmental pollution).

14. Glen: always translating for me, providing our internet access, helping us act as close to locals as possible, being aware of our individual expectation and priorities (I wouldn't have made it La Mora without your insistance), your saviness in getting around (and making connections), and your attention to us all as individuals.

15. Travis: of course your enthusiasm for everything, for going with me to La Mora, your stubborness in the things you believe in, your love for all things tiny, your diligence and discipline, and your willingness to talk.

16. Cheri: for teaching me to share (sorry, just a joke), your stubborness in getting the things that I keep quite (coffee, ice cream), for backing me up in our conversation over pupusas, for sleeping on the floor every night, for coming from the same joke database (the nest), and your understanding in all the problems I have caused (car, flight etc...)

17. Making it home safely. O wait. I haven't done that yet. Still in California.

Well, there are many more points. But there are some I am thinking about right now. And here are some pictures.

O My Gosh I Have So Much To Say

2008-04-15T21:13:00.000-06:00

Ok, two countries, lots of meetings, lots of people, and lots dirty clothes. I haven´t done a good load of laundry in a few weeks, and haven´t taken a warm pressurized shower in almost two months, so I feel sufficiently dirty. My chacos stink, so my feet stink, and because I lost one of the sandals I brought, I don´t have any way to get away from stinking. Other things I am thinking about is how amazing of a stomach my parents prepared me with, because I have not been sick in the three months we have been traveling. I ate some fruit from a vender today, green mango (which is a new favorite) and jocotes, and I may be feeling a little uneasy from that, but vamos a ver.

2 and a half weeks left, and the moments keep getting better, the volume of our group keeps getting higher as we have fun before the time ends. The end is three weeks in El Salvador, which so far has been impactful, interesting, beautiful, generous and hospitable, and a bittersweet way to end the program. We are lucky to have Karla Morgan here with us, and economics professor at Whitworth, and Salvadorena, and former student of the UCA (University of Central America, a Jesuit University that was very impacted and involved in the civil war). She is Latin through and through, loud and fun, and she knows everything about life in this country. She is a good support for us, and likes to talk about relationships, which always helps the difficult days end with laughs and fun.

I haven´t written hardly anything about Nicaragua, so I will give a quick synopsis of what we did. We started with a week in Managua, hearing lecturers about CAFTA, politics, Maquila unions, microlending organization, and much more. We saw lots of the city, went to a concert of a Sandanista, and had some fun. The next week was spent in the campo (rural areas). We were in a small village that experienced a lot of violence during the contra war, and are now opening up the town to ecotourism through the womens cooperative. There is very little for them to sell as ecotourism because the countryside in Nicaragua is largly deforested, so we saw a few orchids and some coffee. Then we spent 3 days in a work project with an organization called Seeds of Learning, which supports school improvement through community projects. We got to ride in the back of trucks up to a very poor village, where we, with the school kids, painted the school. It was a cool experience, very friendly, hospitible, etc etc. For example, I was talking to a lady who was about my age about children and life, and we ended up talking about fruit, and I told her that I was a fan of Green Mango, so she brought me some the bext day, all cut up with salt, and enough to share. It is always very impactful when you are given so much with people that have so little. We kind of switch roles, like we come with the less generous (in general) hearts, and we try to give what we have, they come with less material possessions, and they give what they can. So the last week in Nicaragua was spent back in Managua, where it seemed like the focus was women´s issues. This week really put the topic into a new light for me. I learned a lot about the depth of gender inequality in Latin America, and also the depth of it in our own society. We left Nicaragua at about 3 in the morning, and arrived in San Salvador the next day, and since we arrived I have loved the country.

We are in the homeland of our professor, and we have a program alumni who lives here and is organizing everything. The first day we were here we spent time with a group called Quetzalcoatl, who works with at high risk youth and in prisons, working against gangs. They were extremely inspirational, and we were able to visit a group of boys in their neighborhood see a mural they had painted. The next day we spent the morning with them talking, chatting, learning about each other, and just hanging out. Very cool experience. We ate dinner one night at one of Karla´s favorite bars when she was in college.

The next day we spent at the UCA, lectures about ES history, and a tour of campus. This included a tour of the chapel, rose gardens, and housing of where the 5 Jesuit fathers were tortured and killed. Too much to express in words, and too much for us to understand very well.

Today we spent at the Legislative Assembly. We had a briefing with ARENA, the right wing party, a tour, and then a briefing with the FMLN, the left wing party. It was an all politics day, so as my head currently hurts, I am going to go to bed after writing about the politics more. So there is an update. Tomorrow a historical site and a free afternoon.

Here we go, into the final weeks, sad, excited, and really bittersweet. Love it here, miss friends back home, and can´t wait to just keep on living. Live and love, the pura vida.

or whatever.
paz de cristo
allyn

2008-03-27T09:50:00.000-06:00

So it has been a few weeks since I was in the place where these pictures are from, but I really want to tell you all about Punta Mona. On the Caribbean coast of Costa Rica, near Panama there is a town called Manzanillo, that is essentially the end of the road. From there we walked 5 miles down the coast, where the below pictures are from, to a Punta Mona, Sustainable Living and Education center. The founder of the center, Stephen Brooks, started the center in 1998, or so, and has created a farm that grows a good portion of the food they eat, uses rain water for everything (which didnt happen for 4 of the days we were there which meant no showering!) and all the power comes from solar panels. We got seminars in composting, use of grey and black water, making chocolate all the way from the fruit, cracking open coconuts, and how to use one tree for food, glue, nitrogen fixing, hallucinogens, and wind braking.

We spent a lot of time talking about the three week homestay that we all just came out of. For me the homestay had so many lessons that I just understood the tip of the iceberg of, and others I dont even know that I had. I learned that others felt the same way, and that others learned stronger lessons about a certain thing than I did, so we were able to share some of those lessons. Making sense of what it meant for us to live with a poor family for three weeks is going to take time, and for now all I can say is that it broke ideas I had about life in a poor community, what relationships are like in a poor community, and my generalizations of life in a poor community. I found my family and community to be teachers of hard work, joy, family, and what it means to be an citizen of the United States, and I felt humility in that I was a stranger to a way of life. A sentiment that many of us shared is that we felt like children, who had to be taught and guided through basic skills in life, as we clutched onto the people who knew what they were doing like we used to clutch onto our parents, and we felt comfortable with the people we could communicate with, and scared of people who we couldnt understand. We didnt understand the jokes we were the butts of, and we didnt know why people stared at us and waited for us to do something. All we understood was that we are all people, and in the end of the day I could still look at my host mom and laugh.

Life at punta mona was swimming suites, no shoes, and dips in the ocean 4 times per day. It was free and joyful, where we could just see each other as a irreplaceable member of our community, no questions asked. For me I was sad that it took me such a place as this to learn these lessons in a real way, becasue I know these lessons are practiced by lots of people in lives wherever they are. Even though most people wont make it to Punta Mona, life like they live it is possible everywhere, without the banana trees a 20 pace walk to the beach. But that is only one exoressions of Gods creativity, so lets see pine trees and snow the same way.

So the last picture is one of the five other students who were placed in my same area and it is a picture in my families finca. We have, Mike Johannsen, Caitlin Risk, Laura Hickey, myself, and Ryan Sabotka.

I want to say a highlight of my last week was talking to Will, and finding out that he was accepted to the University of Oregon for Architecture School!!! My brother is awesome, and may move to the beautiful pacific northwest (which he should do)!

Paz de Cristo, love you all very much.

Punta Mona

2008-03-23T21:54:00.001-06:00

Hello Friends,
So I am going to just add a few pictures here again, and write as soon as possible. These are from Punta Mona, on the Caribbean coast of Costa Rica, at a farm that is 100% off the grid, meaning that they use all rain water and solar power. It was a great learning experience, with challenging lessons about consumption and waste. Well, though challenging it was on the beach, so here are some pictures to brag about my week:)

The lodges.

This is the front of the main lodge where we stayed.

A sunset on the beach.

Pictures of Honduras

2008-03-12T08:14:00.000-06:00

Here are a few pictures of my stay in Honduras. It was a picturesque place to live so I want to share the beauty with you all as much as possible.

My home was on the edge of a ridge in the mountains in Northern Honduras. If you want to look at a map, I was about an hour on dirt road north of the city of Azacualpa in Santa Barbara. The name of the town was named Buena Vista, translated to Good View, and it didn't let anybody down. My host grandmother was basically the matron of the town, who named it and I asked her why she chose the name, and in her joyous way just laughed at me. This is a beautiful sunset from my yard.

My host mother, Sara, on the left, and sister Norma on the left. They were really amazing women, who took very good care of me, and who were good teachers and good friends.

This is Kevin, who was my neighbor, and the play buddy of my host brother Pablito. He is from one of the six families in town who I wasn't related to. This smile was always on his face, whether he was riding on the handle bars of a huge bike down a steep hill, falling out of a wheelbarrow, or skinning his knee.

A neighbors house, with their two girls.

This is cleaning coffee. Not much to say about it.

The cabana behind my is where I slept for the 3 weeks.

Pablito with my house.

Love, allyn

Sorry, but no pictures yet

2008-03-01T22:30:00.000-07:00

Hello again,
I just wanted to let you all know that the hostel we are spending the night at has two computers, and two USB ports that aren´t functioning. Pictures will have to wait until we get back from Punta Mona.

Even though we are only 3 days out of our homestays, we have already had some great conversations, that have touched on real issues that effect most people in the world. Issues of gender, manifested here in machismo, is something that all of us saw a lot in our communities. Some were affected directly more than others, and those who were unfortunately got a insiders view of the objectified and passive life lived by so many women. In Tegucigalpa we were blessed to hear a 25 year old woman talk, who had two kids and was an employee at a Maquila (US owned factory), and her experiences living in a gang controlled part of town. Her story of kids at a young age, coming from a home without a father, growing up on her own, and being a single mom is one of so so many. She was strong and a great mother. The thing that struck me most about this is when one of us asked her what gave her hope for the future, and we all watched as she was confused by the question, and finally saying that she didn´t understand and the pastor who knew her well stepped in for her and explained that her kids are who give her motivation, and the concept of hope is not one thrown around the way we do. That was big for me because we have conversations dominated by hope where others don´t have the time to contemplate on this topic.

So, there are some thoughts for now, and I promise more with pictures of both Honduras and Punta Mona soon. Love you all,

Allyn

Buena Vista, Honduras

2008-03-01T12:01:00.000-07:00

Family and Friends,

If any of you didn´t know why I have been silent for the past three weeks it isn´t because I am lazy. I was living on the town of Buena Vista for three weeks without access to internet, and I can´t lie and say without phone because my host mom multiple times offered that I could use her cell phone to call my mom. Although I wanted to and didn´t feel like I was going to waste their money (because we had paid for our time there), I wanted to keep the contact limited to really feel the loneliness and the spanish only to its fullest. Sorry mom. My entire family kind of thought it was wierd that I didn´t have a huge desire to talk to my family, which I had a hard time communicating that our dependency on our families is to a much lesser degree than families in the communities that we were living in. Arounf 70% of my extended family lived in the same community that I was in, and I couldnt really come up with any way of getting across in a, yes I care about my family, way that I didn´t want to talk for three weeks. So anyways, that is why I have been MIA, but currently I am in a hostel in San Jose, Costa Rica, where we are resting and enjoying the stark contrast of the highly developed city. It is wierd, encouraging, hopeful, and sad all at the same time.

So the 25 in the group rejoined a few days ago, and all have three weeks of stories, thoughts, emotions, frustrations, and questions to sort out. It has already been an awesome time of finding encouragement in the similarities we have, and at the same time difficult in realizing no one will really understand our personal experiences. It has been more of a swap of stories, and soon we will do a debriefing in a more in depth formal way, on the carribbean coast of the country, in an isolated sustainable lodge we will be hiking into. We are all more than excited, but this also means another week of no internet access.

Later tonight I will have access to the technology I need to put some pictures up, so I will get to share my beautiful view and the family that took me in as their own.

For now I hope this gives you a little peak into how things are going, and I wish you all the best at this time. Last night we recieved mail from home, and I was just overwhelmed by the amazing level of kindness and love I recieved from you guys. It was so encouraging and gave me a little of home. I know these are going to be re read in the coming weeks, and I will hopefully get to thank you all personally for your words of encouragment and keeping me updated on your lives, which as much as you don´t believe me, is so relieving to read about home. So keep the updates coming. More to come!!

Love
Allyn

Goodbye Guatemala

2008-02-05T14:57:00.000-07:00

Roommate outside our home in Xela

Hello Hello!

It has been quite a while since my last update, so this will be busy, but only with the important things.

The first week after my last update, was another week of classes and activities. This week we all felt more comfertable in Xela, and became closer with our families and one another. No longer was everything new, but familiar, and we started to veture out more with our new found confidence (a one week confidence if you will). We had a great lecture about Liberation Theology that we had plenty of discussions about. For those who don't know, Liberation Theology was a movement of renewed faith for many, mostly the poor, through small Bible studies and a new way of reading the Bible. Our lecturer was someone who has a lot of experience and knows many of the more famous liberation theologians. The next day we watched a Mayan prayer ceremony, that included burning candles, pine branches, corn and many other goodies. We had a merengue dance lesson, that got a lot of us excited about going out to a discotequa, which we did that weekend and had a lot of fun.

This weekend was jam packed, starting with us finding a little cafe that had a few TV rooms, and we went for a little bit of home and watched Good Will Hunting. For 2 hours we were transported back to the US, except for the wooden "couch" I was sitting on. The next morning we took a busride through some beautifull green countryside to climb a valcano where there is a sacred Mayan lagoon, or crater lake, that was really beautiful. That is where the group picture was taken. After seeing the mayan ceremony we recognized the same ones being done at the lake. It was a little wierd, being that 26+ gringos showed up to this sacred spot, where mayan ceremonies are still practiced, and still very much a sacred place. I felt like we didn't really have a place being there just watching there ceremonies, but they don't have a lot of power to make it off limits to foreigners, if they wanted to. So, the next morning we took another beautiful drive through the countryside to some natural hotsprings. There is another picture of this place. On the drive home we learned a little about the area. There has been years of importation of plastic, pesticides, and hybrid crops, that for a while helped the economy and people, but which has now left high infant mortality rates, piles of trash everywhere, and almost extinct traditional crops. Backtracking this progression is very difficult, but hopefully steps can be made to divert some of the downward spiral. Then the next day we took a 3 hour bus ride (on windy mountain roads) to a famous market named Chichicastenango. It was an impressive market with some of the most beautiful things I have ever seen, and hundreds of venders. With the beautiful market came many wealthy shoppers, beggers, and agressive venders. We ended the day playing with some beautiful children at the church, and when my friend Kristina took out her digital camera, they went crazy and she has a lot of mid level pictures of people.

The next week was our last week of school. I spent a lot of time with my host family, talking and joking around, and learning a lot about why they have students at their house and their background. We learned that although the families are paid pretty well to host us, our family doesn't need the money and they do it almost all for the relationships. They have students who return to visit them all the time, and she has plans to go visit a lot in the states. She also told us the last night she was there a story about her daughter when she was traveling and got robbed on the streets, and a stranger took her into her house and took care of her. She says that the feelings she had when her daughter was traveling are the same parents have when their children travel to Guatemala, and she sees her giving to students as a part of the entire system, and it being her way of giving back. It was a lot of fun spending the last days with her, and we ended the week sharing a few bottles of wine (between 7 people) and sharing pictures.

Our goodbye party at the school included a salsa dance competition and a meal called EL Pepian with a juice called Ponche, which is like hot pineapple juice with different types of fruit. I competed in the dance competition with a great partner, Christopher Dennis, and actually ended up winning (who knows how) and got a free t shirt from the school. This is a new things for me, maybe I will quite school and take on the gift I never knew I had (don't worry Dad).

Saturday morning we embarked on what is called "the plunge" which includes a group of 4, 40$ a piece, and a name of a town, and two days to scope it out and meet some friends. We were sent to a town that was 90% indigenous, no other gringos, and met a mormom family who invited us over for dinner and shared their testimonies, and ended up just talking about life, our studies, and the town. They weren't a wealthy family, and just felt like inviting strangers over to share their lives with. Travels don't get much better than that.

Totonicapan(picture)

With all the fun adventures, there are many difficult things to see and try to learn from here in Guatemala, a country with 51% poverty rate. The images that I can't get out of my mind are daily, and trying to figure out what to do is on my mind all the time. Luckily I am with a group of 25 students who are thinking similar things, granted that we are all dealing with things differently.

Now we are in a polar opposite town of Antigua, where foreigners are as common as locals, but the city is beautiful so I can see why. Tomorrow morning we travel to Honduras, where we are in homestays for 3 weeks, and is the part of the trip that I am most excited for. I will out of contract for those weeks, even out of contact with my fellow travelers. So, keep sending me updates, because they are like candy for me, and hopefully I will get back as soon as I can. It was so good to hear from Jenny for the month she was in Africa, and I am going to miss the contact I can have, but can't wait to share things after we are in Costa Rica.

With lots of love,

allyn

At San Andres Xecul, with Laura

2008-01-23T16:44:00.000-07:00

Hi All!

I am first sorry that my first post has taken a while, but then again not that much. We have been really busy, which has been a blessing and a curse both. A blessing because we just returned from a trip to Lake Atitlan, which the picture with the heading is of, and we had a great time. As you could probably guess, the fame of Lake Atitlan hit me in many ways. First, we stayed in a town that was consumed by tourism, which was manifested in the agression of the vendors, and the loud and crazy night life. It was also clear in the rich history of the towns surrounding the lake. There are about 13 towns surrounding, and 12 of them are named after the 12 disciples. They are prodominently indigenous, really in line with the population of the country, and were a hub for guerrilla fighters during the 30 year civil war. We visited Santiago (James), and saw so much. The condition of the people here is still very poor, and somber in the aftermaths of a lot of violence. We visited a church where there was a lot of activity during the war, and where a priest had been assasinated. This is normal history that many of us have a hard time putting our minds around.

As you can guess, the lake was amazing, beautiful, and warm!! Xela, where we are stydying, is a cold city, and our school is built of cinder blocks, and my room is never in the sun, so it was a nice opportunity to get some sun, and some burned skin. We swam a little, and my host dad here teases me about wanting to swim around the entire lake, which is a mere 75 miles. Living with a host family has been pretty great. I have been placed with a fairly wealthy family, with two other girls. The family has friends visiting from all over the world, like a girl who is a student at Colombia University. We eat organic fruit and vegetables, and talk about traveling. It isn´t as snobby as it sounds, as we still take cold showers at times.

Right now I am sitting in an internet cafe, listening to the beatles, and driking coffee, which is a good retreat at times so that we can study and not have our senses overwhelmed, and trying to write things in our field journals that we are observing. Globalization and traveling students have created an interesting culture here. There are a lot of vegetarian restaurants, and internet coffee shops. I freely use them, but at times wish they weren´t here.

One other exerience that has been great, is a visit we made to a women´s weaving cooperative, which I have come to learn that are more common than I once thought. It is a group of mostly war widows, who have really decided to do something for themselves, by joining together to weave, and share the profits to put their children through school and keep them healthy. It was inspiring.

All, thanks for you support, I miss you some, I will more later, and hope you are all having a great January! Love you, and hope you enjoy the pictures!

Allyn

Taking Off!!

2008-01-11T11:52:00.000-07:00

Today, at 4 pm we meet at the school, and then we head to the airport and leave at 7:40 t0night. We get into Guatemala City at 12:30 (central time) tomorrow, and then take a 4 hour bus ride (police escorted, and mom I know you think is exciting) to the city of Quetzaltenango, to start school in Monday! You can see on the map where Quetzaltenango is. This is the link of to the school, http://www.casaxelaju.com/, so check it out if you feel the need to. :) All I know at this point, is that we are learning more spanish, doing cultural activities, and seeing the beautiful sites, while starting to try and orient ourselves in the culture we will be in for 4 months. I also posted a picture of the entire group, including most, not all, of the faculty.

We spent all week in classes, learning about the things we should and should not do, our class work, and what is expected of us. Then yesterday, we were given a small schedule of activites during language school, and we started to believe that we are actually going. So tomorrow, after the talking and thinking and praying and preparing, we are going to see what it is all about. We are going to try to live up to our expectations, and have a lot of fun. Thanks for all of your support, and email me at allyn.krzy@gmail.com, and I would love to hear about all of you!

Also, I haven't quite learned how to put pictures where I want, so soon Will will fix it, and teach me how (thank you Will!!)

Abrazos,

Alina

Ghoncrines

2008-01-03T23:52:00.000-07:00

In honor of the many Central American Political Parties, this is the word I formulated from the names of the countries in the order of our travel. For those who are wondering, we start in Guatemala, then wander through Honduras finding our way into Costa Rica, followed by a stop in Nicaragua and ending in El Salvador. With each country fitting comfortably into the state of New Mexico, this will be a Whole New World. Aladdin graciously lent his theme to my blog, and now I am indebted to a new fantastic point of view.
This first entry is a product of packing all day, and hoping everything will fit into my bag. I will loose the Disney theme in the entry's to come, but for now that's all I have to offer. Thanks friends, if you are still with me. I will work to keep this updated regularly, with thoughts, stories, and prayers. Happy New Year, and fly high with your dreams. Good night.